CELEBFLASH: Crunch Edition

Living right behind Crunch, it'd be easy to stop on by for a quick workout, especially since the Ohio guy who signed up Mikey gave me a bunch of free passes. So last Sunday, in order to check out the gym, I offered to help Mikey with his chest workout. On a lazy Sunday afternoon, I didn't expect much of anything, but as always, you never know who you'll stumble across in LA!

Find The Flaw

When I see a fitness model in the flesh, I'm always blown away by their "beauty". With their chiseled abs and bulging biceps, these are some of the best looking men around, having graced the covers of such homo-rotica as Men's Workout and Exercise For Men Only. I admit it, I have a hard time not starring, but, in not been able to take my eyes of their perfect physiques, one begins to notice flaws!

Shock! Horror! Yes, these guys aren't perfect. Their skin is bad, their hair receding, or as in the case of recent sighting Greg Plitt, they have absolutely no ass! No ass and no legs... He looks disproportionate with his perfectly-huge arms and chest dwarfing his non-existent ass and thighs. This realisation, first coined by another Kevin (Mike's buddy in DC), is known as "Find The Flaw," and will become my new favourite gym game. No longer will I been intimidated by apparent perfection... I will Find The Flaw!!!

Boy Drops Weights

So, we're working out next to this kid doing bench presses. He looks familiar. I'm sure he's some reality show contestant from Boy Meets Boy, or something of that ilk. He's a little guy, he's benching 135lbs, then all of a sudden CRASH! and he's dropped his weights. One of the 45s has fallen off the bar and he's floundering. We've all had it happen, it's embarrassing, you try and pretend it never happened, but still someone sniggers. Mike and I were the sniggerers. And right or wrong we continued to chortle at this D-Lister, as well as the other beautiful people we'd found flaws in, throughout the rest of our workout.

Cut to: Monday night and The Golden Globes. The nominations for Best Actor in a TV Mini-Series or Movie are being read out, and Mike and I are stunned into momentary silence... then bust out laughing. The kid we'd seen drops his weights... the skinny kid with bad skin... the one with the perpetual scowl we'd laughed at... none other than Jonathan Rhys-Meyers... the cute guy from Bend It Like Beckham... and he goes on and wins the Globe!

"Thank you to all those who worked with me on Elvis , and to those guys who laughed at me at the gym - F**K You!"