Are you ready for some...?

It's been 13 years and though I really still don't get America's fascination with "football", I have tried:

In '94 I got an internship in the sports department of WUSA 9, DC's CBS affiliate. I was supposed to sit there Sunday afternoons, watch the games and make note of big plays. Needless to say it was a very short lived internship.

During the 1999-2000 season I spent many a rainy Saturday afternoon watching college games, drinking beer and eating Trio pizza with then future roommate Dr. Robbie, a Notre Dame alum and ardent Fighting Irish fan. College boys in tight uniforms, that's pretty hot!

That year's Varsity Blues also found a special place in my heart, or is it really Scott Caan's marvelous ass that I remember so fondly?

And in 2002 I spent Thanksgiving in Dallas, watching the Cowboys thrash the Redskins at Texas Stadium (OK, so it was only 27-20), but as much as I loved the experience, the muscle boys performing in the Cirque du Soleil-esq. halftime show and this one particular hottie on the sideline were the ones that really held my attention.

Tonight, Wednesday, marks the season finale of MTV's Two-A-Days (though my Tivo will preempt the show and instead record Project Runway). Will the boys of Hoover High win another state championship? Will #24 Max be caught short in his skin-hugging Under Armour? And will #34 Alex take his shirt off one last time?

That entire towns can become so entrenched, besotted and only identified by their high school football teams truly amazes, fascinates, and even scares me. It makes me wonder if football is really little more than another "cult," not so unlike Scientology (or any other religion come to think of it) that people worship on Sundays, pour many billions of dollars in to, discuss and debate ad infinitum, but ultimately get very little out of.

Now these strapping young Hoover boys have finished their season, I'll tune into NBC's Friday Nights Lights to get my fix of crazy football worshipping zealots (and young actors pretending to be strapping young players), and hopefully learn more about the mindset of Middle America.